One Big Happy Family
by Arrow of Artemis
Summary: What happens when you leave a Huntress, a satyr, and the kids of two powerful demigods? Could they control the children, and at the same time, keep the house in one piece? -Two-shot-
1. Chapter 1

**I'M ALIVE! :D Missed me, peeps? No? Oh, okay. Anyway, Percy and Annabeth are both 27 years of age, married, and they have two kids (Sofia "Sofie" Grace and Lucas "Luke" Arthur, both 5 years old). Thalia is forever 15-almost-16, and Grover is about ****27********,********28**years old (in human age). So, yeah, **th****a****t'****s****a****l****l**. Enjoy! :)

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**This two-shot is dedicated to MoonlitSky321, the one who've suggested this idea.**

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**DISCLAIMER: Don't own characters, except for little Sofie and Luke and the plot itself.**

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"Bye Sofie. Bye Luke," Annabeth said to their children.

Percy waved to the kids and their godparents (a.k.a. the babysitters). "Bye kiddos. Be nice to your Uncle Grover and Aunt Thalia, 'kay?"

Sofie and Luke nodded and said, "Yes, Daddy."

"You sure you're gonna be okay here, Thals? Grover?" the daughter of Athena asked the Huntress.

They nodded. "Yes, Annie. Now go to that fancy restaurant. Bye!" Thalia said while pushing the couple out of the door.

"That was supposed to be a surprise, Thalia!" Percy shouted as he and his wife were pushed out of their house.

The girl smirked. "Whatever, Kelp Head; I don't care. Off you go!" she said as she slammed the door shut.

She turned to the satyr and the kids, grinning. "So, who wants to bake some cookies?"

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The four had been doing—and re-doing—batches of blue cookies, just like what Sally Jackson-Blofis taught her daughter-in-law. Fortunately, Annabeth, being the daughter of Athena she is, had a copy of the famous blue cookies. Thalia and Grover, together with Sofia and Luke, followed the instructions; everything was okay until the kids played with the ingredients, particularly the flour and food coloring. They threw and splattered flour and blue coloring everywhere; unfortunately, 'everywhere' included their godparents.

"Gods of Olympus, Thalia!" said Grover, whose hair and face was powdered white with drops of blue on his mortal disguise. "Help me stop the kids!"

"I _am _helping you, Grover!" Thalia spat back. They continued to catch the children, but to no avail. Grover started to panic.

_Oh, gods, _he thought, _Percy and Annabeth's going to kill_ _us when they see this mess. _Especially _Annabeth!_

In his moment of panicking, he reached for his reed pipes in his pocket and started playing some tunes. Vines began to crawl inside the house, attempting to catch Sofia and Luke. Instead, it got tangled up on the furniture and appliances. The kids pointed and laughed at what they claimed as the 'long, green thingies'.

While they ran towards their parents' bedroom, Thalia noticed the vines that continued to grow. She stomped towards Grover, who stopped playing his pipes as soon as he saw the Huntress nearing.

Thalia shouted, "What in Hades, Grover! What did you do?"

The satyr fidgeted nervously before facing Zeus' daughter. "I-I played my pipes so I c-can stop the kids…"

"Well, you did a _great _job there, Grover," she said sarcastically.

"At least I tried!" Grover said.

Thalia rolled her eyes, "Yeah, whatever. I'll try to remove these vines before the two lovebirds come home."

"But how?" he asked curiously.

Thalia smirked at him. "Just watch and learn, Grover. Watch and learn."

She closed her eyes and raised her arm up. Grover saw this and realized what the girl was going to do.

"No, Thalia, don't!" he said with widened eyes.

But it was too late. She had already summoned lightning to get rid of the vines. But instead of being removed, the vines were caught on fire and started burning everything they got hold on.

The adults screamed, and the kids, having inherited Percy's Poseidon-ish powers, were not that affected of the fire that touched their bare feet. They continued to run while Thalia and Grover splashed water on the fire.

"I warned you, Thals," Grover said while throwing a bucketful of water on the fire. The blaze was getting smaller, for the demigod and satyr had been splashing it for almost 30 minutes.

Thalia took time to glare at him, but said nothing. They continued extinguishing the fire for ten more minutes, and they had successfully extinguished it. The two were tired and worn-out by that time, and were ready to lie down on the slightly-burned floor, but suddenly remembered one important thing.

"The kids!" they exclaimed simultaneously. They were suddenly alert, and then searched the whole first floor of the house for the children. They shouted Sofie and Luke's names while looking in every room (some of which are luckily not scorched). The Jackson children, wanting to play, mistook the shouting of their godparents as a hide-and-seek game. They took off from their room upstairs excitedly and ran down the stairs.

As they sped off to their hiding places, Sofie and Luke ran past Thalia and Grover, who were still looking for them. Grover sensed them running, so he signaled to Thalia about this quietly. They briskly walked towards the mini-library, which the Huntress said is the hiding place because "it was the boringest room and most perfect place to hide in."

"'Boringest' isn't even a word," Grover mumbled to himself.

When they had reached and entered the mini-library, they whisper-shouted—well, Grover whisper-shouted, Thalia just screamed her lungs out—Sofie and Luke's names, as if playing a real game of hide-and-seek. After some shouting and looking around, the demigod and satyr finally heard some quiet giggling from between the marine biology and microbiology—who studies microbiology, they do not know—shelves. The adults slowly and gently tiptoed towards the source of the sound, and…

They stepped back and screamed very loudly in surprise. Sofia and Luke had jumped in front of their godparents and shriek-laughed. After the "surprise attack", they had run outside of the library and towards the kitchen. While this happened, Thalia and Grover breathed in and out deeply, slowly putting their selves in proper disposition. After doing so, they ran after the kids, _again._ They ran in the direction of the kitchen, avoiding some burned things and jumping over semi-burned vines.

"Sofie!—Luke!" Thalia said while panting. Grover did the same, except for the shouting bit.

Grover, having over-sensitive satyr senses, smelled something burning inside the kitchen.

"Hey, Thalia," he asked, "did you summon lightning again?"

She looked at him incredulously. "Excuse me, _what_? You think I did that?"

Grover groaned. "Ugh, just ignore what I said, Thalia. Let's check out the other half of the kitchen."

The Huntress grumbled childishly, but followed what he said. What they saw had beaten all other surprises and weirdness they had seen for the day. Luke, who was standing on a mini-stool, turned the stove on and off, burning bread and marshmallows. Sofie, on the other hand, was playing with the blue food coloring and the flour they used earlier. Both of the children's mouths were full of blue cookies.

Thalia and Grover were suddenly alarmed of what they were doing, especially what _Luke _was doing.

"Grover," she started, "take care of little Sofie there. Clean her up. I'm gonna stop this kiddo from burning up any more objects here."

Grover nodded, and then proceeded to carry Sofia away from the freakishly huge kitchen (which, by the way, was starting to smell like a mix of overly-burned toast, roasted marshmallows, and smoke).

Thalia approached the 'aspiring chef'. "Hey there, buddy," she said. "What'cha cooking?"

"Iym cuhking ahre wuhnch," Luke said while chewing his cookie, toasting his bread, and roasting some marshmallows—all at the same time.

She kind of understood it as "I'm cooking our lunch," but you never know with this kid—he might have inherited his father's Seaweed Brain-ishness. She slowly reached out to turn off the stove to avoid any unnecessary kitchen burning; however, Luke had other plans. He beat Thalia to the knob and turned it more to the left, making it burn more brightly. He guffawed loudly and clapped happily, despite the fact that he was in front of a fire which was starting to set other flammable kitchen items near it.

Thalia, although feeling tired and groggy, summoned rainclouds and willed it to rain on the fire in the kitchen. Rain poured in the entire house, not just in the kitchen, where the fire really was burning. Luke started jumping and clapping and laughing, and Thalia could hear Sofie's squeals of happiness.

_This night_, Thalia thought with a sigh, _is the weirdest and most tiring nights I've experienced._ Ever.


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: Don't own PJO/HoO; Rick Riordan does. Also don't own any other brands/companies/shows/movies/songs mentioned; they are owned by their respective owners.**

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Rain continued pouring down the Chase-Jackson house, making it flood inside. Of course, the fire had subsided into smoke, and the mess they have done has completely washed out, but every single floatable object in the house has, well, floated. Sofie and Luke jumped up and down while running around, obviously enjoying the "catastrophe"—as Grover had put it—and luckily, they have inherited their father's waterproof abilities. That lessened one thing on Thalia and Grover's "to-fix-and/or-manage-before-Percy-and-Annabeth- arrives list".

The water—fortunately, it was only in the first floor—had reached Thalia's mid-calf, which was already waist-high to the children. Sighing yet again, she willed the rain to stop. It took a while for the downpour to actually stop, and when it did, the children had stopped running and jumping. They were confused as to why the rain stopped. Sofie started crying.

"You know," Thalia says to Grover, "I think it would be better to deal with teenagers who are always crying over shows and books and movies and the music world than _this_."

"What? _This, _as in her crying, or _this_, as in all of these things which happened today?" Grover inquired.

"The latter," she said simply. Thalia walked towards the bathroom to unplug the drain. She told Grover to also unplug the one in the kitchen floor.

"More drains open, less work for us," she had said.

Grover didn't need any words of inspiration or something; he wanted to rest, so he'll do _anything _just to finish this job, obligation, _thing_—he didn't even know what to call it anymore. He has to admit, though, like Thalia, he would happily accept the duty of controlling teenage angst than this whole thing. This was too much for him—at least, for now, since he and Juniper are thinking of creating their own little family of satyr-nymph babies…but that's a story for another time.

He had already reached the kitchen—the _first half_ of the kitchen—and opened the drain, which, fortunately, was conveniently placed next to the doorway. He silently thanked the gods for the effort he didn't have to exert.

After opening it, the water slowly went down the drain. Grover would have stared at the swirling water much longer—as if it would be drained faster if he did it—but he heard Thalia calling him from the living room.

"Grover!" she shouted. "Where in Zeus's name are you?"

Grover sighed exasperatedly. "Coming, coming," he muttered, but repeated it again, clearer and louder, when he realized that Thalia would not hear it.

He walked—no, _dragged _himself towards the living room, where the water had lowered to Thalia's ankles. Had it really drained that fast?

Or maybe I just took a long time to go the kitchen or something, he thought.

"Why did you call me, Thals?" he asked.

Thalia's mind was, apparently, off wandering somewhere else; Grover had to snap his fingers in front of her face for about ten times to get her attention.

She blinked. "Wha—oh, yes. Grover. Hi."

"Yes, Thalia. _Hello._" He said, "Now, why did you call me here?"

"Ah, yes, that. Well…" she started.

"Well?" Grover said impatiently.

Thalia was being uncharacteristically nervous. "Annabeth called. She said they'd be here in twenty minutes."

"What are we waiting for, then? Let's clean this mess up," he said. _So that I can go back to my satyr-ish duties, _he added mentally.

He had learned, from the past years of him residing in Camp Half-Blood with Percy and the others, that one should never _ever _do anything against Annabeth's orders. Disobedience will result in her giving you her signature icy glares (which make you feel like the glare is following you _**everywhere**_); kicking your ass in sparring; bossing you around; or, worse, all of the above.

Not that Grover had learned these things from experience. Nuh-uh.

Grover got the mop and some sponges from the supply cabinet, located very conveniently near the staircase. It had lessened the number of steps he needed to take.

_I _really _have to ask Annabeth to be our architect, _he thought as he got the mop and the sponges (which, he thought to himself, vaguely resemble that annoying sponge from a children's cartoon). He gave the porous objects to the huntress, and started mopping some of the water that weren't drained.

Luckily for the both of them, the floor wasn't some sort of carpet-thingy, for it was made of blue-gray marble tiles, or else it would've taken them _days _just to dry that off. Also, the couches and loveseats were made from a leathery material, so they just wiped the water off the portions that were wet.

"So," Grover said, prolonging the 'o' sound. "Where are the kids?"

"Tucked them in their beds. Were very tired after all that happened," Thalia answered. She was scrubbing the other furniture, squeaky-clean. "Hope they wouldn't wake up and tell the legend of the night when Percabeth comes home."

Grover chuckled at the mention of "Percabeth". Ever since the two, Percy and Annabeth, had been a couple when they were sixteen, their friends at camp—including Rachel the oracle—had collectively called them "Percabeth". They never said it straight to the couple's faces, though, especially during the time when they had the quest to stop Gaea and her forces. Until the wedding had happened, they all openly call the two "Percabeth" (it's a _ship name_, actually, Piper said).

After several minutes of scrubbing and mopping, they had finally finished fixing—_more like _repairing_, _Thalia said—the whole first floor of the house. And by that time, a _certain someone _decided to call them (or the house, but that's unlikely, Grover thought).

"Hello? Thalia, is that you?" Annabeth said through the phone after Thalia put it on loudspeaker.

The huntress sighed. "Yes, Annie. It's me. You near the house yet?"

"Actually, yeah, we are. We just passed by Starbucks—it's open for 24 hours, Perce, believe it—the one two blocks away from the house?"

"Yeah, yeah. I remember," Thalia tiredly said. "Say, could you go back to there and pick us up some coffees?"

Annabeth replied, "Oh, sure thing. Kinds?"

"Seven cups of espresso. The largest size," Grover replied. His brain was lacking its daily coffee intake, hence not remembering the name for the largest cup of coffee served in Starbucks.

"Three espressos for me. Same with Grover; the largest size available," Thalia added.

"Mm'kay. See you there, guys," Annabeth hung up.

Thalia tiredly collapsed on the couch, and Grover imitated her, but he collapsed on the whitish love seat, instead.

"I'm. So. TIRED," Thalia said the last part with a half-annoyed, half-exasperated scowl. "I am _never __**ever **_going to babysit again for two years."

Randomly, Grover hummed the tune of "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" by Taylor Swift. He then looked at her without raising his head. "What if Annabeth asks you to? Or begs you to?"

She smirked. "I'm gonna make up some excuse or something. And," she added, "she never begs."

"Good point."

They were silent for quite a long time, before Grover broke the silence. "Do you think we should clean ourselves up?"

"Mmm, okay. Go first, I'm gonna take a nap." She closed her eyes and curled up on the couch sleepily.

It was then Grover realized that it was a great idea to bring some of his necessities. Call him an over-prepared satyr, but hey, you'll never know when times like this happen. He entered the bathroom downstairs, and began cleaning himself up. When he finished doing so, he called out to Thalia, saying it was her turn to tidy herself up. She groaned in reply, obviously not wanting to stand up from her comfortable position, but went to the bathroom anyway.

Grover decided to kill some time by watching some TV. He sat on the couch and turned the television on, flipping through random channels. None of the shows were entertaining enough for him, so he settled on watching a movie instead. Looking through the couple's movie collection, a particular film caught his eye. It was about a girl who was forced on going to college. He had heard Juniper talk about this to him, and she had said the movie had some pretty awesome song covers and mash-ups, so it had sparked an interest in him. (Juniper had also mentioned an all-boy a cappella group was in here—"They're so cute and awesome!" she had said— and that she had a little crush on some guy named Jesse that was insanely hot, and Grover was kinda-sorta-maybe jealous, but don't ever tell her that.)

He put the DVD on the player, and the film had started off with an _a cappella_ version of the Universal Studios theme. _I guess it isn't bad, _he thought.

Thalia entered the living room and saw him intently looking at the screen as the movie played. He was at the part where two girls were singing in a shower room…naked.

"Hey," Thalia said. "Isn't that—"

He cut her off. "Yes. It is. Now shut up and watch it with me if you want to." Grover rarely snapped at his friends, but he didn't want to not hear any single word uttered by the characters.

Thalia followed, and sat beside him on the floor, in front of the television screen. Together, they watched the movie—laughing at some scenes, and singing along to the songs. After an hour or so of watching, they finally finished the movie. Both were speechless and their mouths were open in surprise.

"How…?" Thalia said. "Oh my gods, why did they end it there? The endings were supposed to be the best part! It's…it's just… Ugh! I demand a part two!"

Grover simply nodded. "I feel you, dude. But you gotta admit—you did _not _expect Lilly to beat-box in their final performance."

"Nope, I didn't. The riff-off was _so cool_, though," Thalia stated.

The two shared their opinions and thoughts on the movie intently; they were so focused that they didn't notice Percy and Annabeth enter the house through the back door and head towards the kitchen.

"Thalia? Grover? Your coffees are here," Percy called out.

Thalia was the first one to hear Percy's shout. Her eyes widened as she muttered Grover's name.

No response.

"HEY! GROVER!" she whisper-yelled. "They're already here! Fix everything here; I'll go to…wherever they are now."

He nodded in response and started arranging the things in the living room. Thalia, on the other hand, went to where the sounds came from—the kitchen. She entered the room with a calm expression on her face, but inside, she was as scared as hell. Not for watching one of their movies, but because she's nervous that one of the kids would wake up and tell the couple _everything _that had happened that day.

"Oh, hey, Annabeth. Percy," she greeted. "So, these are our coffees, right? Okay, I'll just get these—" she got hold of the bags containing the cups, "—and be on our way. Grover's _very _tired and I've still got some errands to run, so…bye."

Thalia didn't wait for their response. She just brisk-walked towards the living room to fetch Grover and leave, until her fear turned to reality.

"DADDY! MOMMY!" two small voices shouted. Thalia stopped walking and suppressed her urge to face-palm right then and there.

The chants comprising of repetitions "MOMMY!" and "DADDY!" were getting louder as the children came closer to their parents.

Sofie was the first to reach Annabeth. "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy! We had _so _much fun today with Auntie Thalia and Uncle Grover! We—"

"—baked cookies and played with flour and coloring and water and it was like we're swimming!" Luke cut his sister's rambling with his own. He all but jumped as he exclaimed what happened.

Percy's face perked up at the mention of water and swimming. "Oh, really?" he asked Luke, kneeling to match his son's height. "You swam? Where?"

Honestly, by that time, Thalia was kind of scared as to what the couple's reaction will be. "Inside the house," Luke and Sofie answered excitedly.

And that was the time when Grover chooses to enter the kitchen. "Oh, hey, guys. Thals, I thought the kids were—" He abruptly stopped talking when he glanced at Annabeth's half-annoyed, half-resigned expression and at Percy's fully-amused face.

Grover sighed. "Hey, Thals?"

"Yeah?"

"Do they already know?"

"Yeah."

The satyr visibly—and audibly—gulped. _Well, here it goes, then._

"Would any of you two explain to me how this 'swimming' thing happened," Annabeth asked, rubbing her eyes tiredly and exasperatingly. Percy whispered something to her, and she nodded. He then led the obviously sleepy children to their rooms. Grover gazed at him with a message in his eyes: DON'T LEAVE US HERE DUDE SAVE US FROM THE WRATH OF YOUR WIFE OH GODS PLEASE PERCY HELP US

To which Percy's still-amused eyes seemingly answered: You're on your own, pal. Good luck, though. Tell me the details _if _and _when _you survive. Then, he grinned and walked away with his children.

_Well, _Grover thought, _isn't this fun._

"So?" Annabeth asked again. "What happened?"

Thalia answered, "Oh, y'know; we just baked and it eventually led to a food fight, then…yeah."

"Then _what_?" the daughter of Athena questioned further.

"Um, I might've played my pipes to catch the kids…?" Grover said, but with a tone of uncertainty.

The huntress smiled nervously. "And I might've summoned some lightning to remove Grover's vines… And, oh! Don't forget about the rain I might or might not have brought down to extinguish the fire in here awhile ago."

Grover had always liked silence, but it was not appreciated at this situation. Annabeth's silence and expressionless face was like the calm before the storm. It didn't usually mean good news.

They all stood there facing each other for some more moments. Thalia ended up leaving the coffee bags on one counter; Grover was tapping a beat on his left wrist with the fingers on his right hand; and Annabeth had her arms folded on her chest, her gray eyes still revealing no emotion.

"So," Percy entered. "What do we have here? Still giving them the silent treatment, Anna?"

Even when Percy used his nickname for her—which she despised, but the feeling had degraded to a simple dislike—she remained as motionless as a statue.

"Annabeth…" Thalia started. She, too, was feeling quite scared at Annabeth. And that was saying something, since the huntress was _rarely _scared of anything.

Twitch.

There it was! A small yet significant twitch of the blonde demigod's lips was enough proof that she wasn't _that _emotionless.

"…Pfft. Ha…ha, ha…hahahahaha!" Annabeth started chuckling, but it turned into full-blown hysterics. Percy followed, steadying himself on the countertop next to him.

Grover's jaw slackened and his eyes were as wide as platters. When he looked over to Thalia, her expression wasn't too far from his. Her electric blue eyes were conveying something like '_what the heck is happening here?'_

Shrugging his shoulder, he mouthed _'I don't really know but I'm guessing that they think everything that had happened is so damn funny' _before looking towards the couple once again. They weren't laughing as loudly as awhile ago, but the amusement was still clear on their faces.

"So—hahaha—you guys might be thinking that I'm—haha _ohmygods_—angry at you two," Annabeth said.

"Well, actually, at first yes. But now…" Thalia started.

Grover finished her sentence, "We think that you're actually…not?"

"No, I was and am not angry. I'm honestly surprised that the house didn't totally burn down, and I'm also entertained at the facts that: 1) you thought I was angry; 2) your faces looked priceless awhile ago; and 3) you were able to survive the kids' peculiar activities." Annabeth turned to her husband, "Remember the first time the two of us had to go through that? When they were just two and a half years old?"

Percy laughed once more. "Yeah, we were so stressed out and helpless that we called my mom at two in the morning just to assist us," he wiped tears from his eyes. "Oh, good times. Good times."

"See," Annabeth stated to the other duo, "you're not the only ones who had to go through them. But I think they lay off the 'activities' when the two of you babysat them."

Thalia gasped in a surprised manner. "So…you mean there were times when Sofie and Luke were much…_worse_?"

The wedded couple simply nodded.

"Oh, gods," Grover muttered. "Never tell me to babysit again if ever that happens."

Thalia vigorously shook her head. "Same here. If you ever force me to do that, I will personally drag you to Uncle Hades' palace," she declared seriously.

Annabeth and Percy merely said okay's as an agreement.

"Now, we'll just go off to give the two of you some privacy," Grover spoke after some seconds of silence. "But," he added, "please don't go and have another child. Two are already enough."

They blushed furiously while Thalia and Grover snickered. Annabeth then pushed her friends to the doorway, her face remaining tomato red.

"Bye, guys! Thanks for everything!" she shouted out before closing—more like _slamming_—the door to the Jackson household. Percy waved from the living room window, but it looked like Annabeth pulled him away as soon as she closed the entrance.

"Do you think they're gonna do _that_?" Grover asked with a smile.

Thalia smirked. "Probably. I just hope Sofie and Luke won't be able to hear them and go barging in on them."

They both laughed, walking away from the eventful house. But, after just about fifty steps away, Thalia stopped in her tracks. "Grover, the coffees!"

"What about the coffees? Don't you have the bags?" he questioned, terrified at the fact that he won't have his night serving of the delicious caffeine goodness.

"No! I think I left them in the kitchen!" she paced back and forth. "We have to get them!"

Grover's eyes widened. "No. No, no, no, no. Who knows what they're doing now?!"

"I don't care! I just want my coffees back!" Thalia ran back to the door and pounded on it like her life depended on it.

The satyr shrugged. Might as well do the same. As far as he knew, he wouldn't be able to survive the walk back home without the wonderful aroma of the brownish-black delight. He ran back to the house, too, and banged the door, shouting "PERCY! ANNABETH! OUR COFFEES!" alongside Thalia.

Oh, well. There's never a boring day—and night—in their family, right? And that's why they all love one another. They're not just a one big, happy family; they're one big, happy, _crazy_ family.

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**A/N: GUYS. I OFFER YOU A SEVEN-PAGE LONG CHAPTER (well, at least on MS Word) TO MAKE UP FOR YOUR WAITING. I don't know, writer's block hit me and that was the time when school was pretty busy. So, technically, I held this off until my summer vacation—which is now. Yeah...  
**

/i'mawkwardokaysuckitup

**So, anyway, sorry for any grammatical/spelling mistakes. **_{and i dont really like how this ended it was more like i was just typing out words but anyhoo}_ **Here's the final chapter for OBHF.** **I hope you guys like it. And I'd like to thank** **all of you for sticking with this story** **(and** **for bearing with me) until the end of this two-shot.** _{i'm making this look like i'm saying a very dramatic farewell speech gawd}**  
**_

**For the last time, though, in this story, I'm gonna ask (force? nag? idek) you readers to tell me what you thought of this; if you liked it, hated it, anything. Thanks, guys. Byeeee~**


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